What if?

Let's face it.

There are some friends or some people that mean something to us and when we see them, we can't help saying "What if?"
 ***
What if she didnt want to be friends anymore?
What if he loved me?
What if they hated me?
What if they left me?
What if i couldn't see him anymore?
What if she didn't care about me?
What if?
 ***
 These are the questions that never disappear until we have the answers. Or until we get a headache.
Sometimes it doesn't work though.
Anyway.
Do we get the answers?
Here is an answer:
No.
And do you know that the hardest ones to answer are the questions about ourselves?
I noticed that recently.
Do you care about yourself?
Do you mean anything to yourself?
I do. Not.
 ***
What if i hated myself?
What if i died?
What if i were a mean person?
What if i were alone, all by myself?
What if?
 ***
Realize?
Do you have the answers?
What if you died?
Maybe death is an unfair question.
But what if you died?


 Think about that and have some more questions, have some more question marks.
And find the answers.
I mean if you dont want to have a headache.
 ***
I have a lot of problems.
And a lot of questions, that haven't been answered yet.
Yes, i need to think more
and of course i would think more,
if i had the time for it.
So,
I have to be contented with a headache for awhile.